PITTSBURGH — If it had been a comedy routine, it would have been hilarious. And classic.

But as he stood outside the West Virginia lockerroom, eyes still red from crying after WVU’s 19-15 loss to Pitt Friday at Heinz Field, it wasn’t comedy on the mind of quarterback Patrick White. Anything but.

“This is going to be quick,” White said, to no one in particular.

Joe Starkey of the Pittsburgh Tribune-Review started the proceedings.

Starkey noted that LeSean McCoy of Pitt carried the ball 38 times (for a career-best 183 yards) and he (White) 12 times, and wanted to know if White’s lack of carries lessened WVU’s chances of winning.

White: “What kind of question is that?”

Starkey asked White if he carried the ball enough.

White: “It doesn’t matter. It’s a loss.”

Starkey tried again, asking White if he had run the ball more, would WVU’s chances of winning been better.

White: “If it was a fifth (of liquor), we’d all be drunk, right?”

Classic. That’s one of those lines you don’t forget.

Unfortunately for White, the only thing he’s going to take from Friday’s loss is that he felt directly responsible for the defeat.

“I felt it was personally my fault that we lost,” White said. “I felt like my mistakes hurt us.”

His interception deep in WVU territory in the fourth quarter set up a McCoy touchdown that cut the Mountaineers’ lead to 15-13. So he has a point.

“Bad read, bad ball,” White said. “I threw it right to (Jovani Chappel). I guess it looked like he was on my team, huh?”

Problem is, White has been responsible for so many wins at West Virginia, it is hard for me to fault the quarterback who will go down as the greatest to ever play the position at WVU.

White has earned a pass. In fact, he has a lifetime pass. Don’t blame the kid for one bad read.

He is also the top rushing QB in NCAA history — with two games left, the final looking more and more like the Meineke Car Care Bowl in Charlotte. He is the leader in the Big East in touchdowns responsible for along with several other records.

We can cut the QB a break, I would think.

But as the leading rusher in NCAA history, 12 carries, at least three of which were scrambles, aren’t going to cut it.

What say you, offensive coordinator Jeff Mullen?

“Well, he was throwing the ball well,” Mullen said. “That’s going to cut down on his runs.”

Do you concur, Bill Stewart?

“We were throwing the ball pretty well until the interceptions,” Stewart said.

It’s also not White’s fault the calls were convoluted late in the first half.

WVU has the ball, first-and-10 just inside the Pitt 10. Jock Sanders takes it to the one. On the next play, White, in shotgun formation with an empty backfield, goes left, gets strung out and pushed out at the three. Third-and-goal at the 3. Jarrett Brown in at QB. White lines up in the slot, comes in motion and takes the hand-off. Going left, he lobs a pass to 6-foot-8 Wes Lyons in the corner of the end zone, but Lyons can’t come down inbounds with the pass.

A trick play on third-and-goal at the three?

Why not bring Brown in on second-and-goal at the one?

“We thought we’d catch them,” Stewart said. “I thought it was a good call.”

Even more comedy came later, with Pitt driving late in the first half. Despite having McCoy, one of the best backs in the country, Pitt coach Dave Wannstedt tried a fade pass that was intercepted by Quinton Andrews. It was like the coaching staffs were trying to outdumb each other.

Whatever happened to lining up in the I-formation with a fullback and a tailback and trying to score with power football? At least get the QB under center.

For the love of God, it isn’t rocket science.

White will carry a heavy load over Friday’s loss. He shouldn’t. And hey, if this football thing doesn’t work out, maybe he and my old buddy Joe Starkey can take their show on the road.

— E-mail:

demorrison@register-herald.com